i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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