She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
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