She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Is it penis luge time yet?
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
