Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Randomize
