I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
