You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
