Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
operation have a gay friend backfired
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize