Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
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