Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Randomize
