I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I deserve to be covered in dicks
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
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