Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I licked your asshole in confidence.