I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
