I wish I could punch you in the face.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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