I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
