Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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