I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
