Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
