What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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