Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
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