the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Randomize
