is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
