Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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