Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
