I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
It's not a walk of shame if you run
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
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