champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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