I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize