Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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