hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Randomize