I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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