girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
