Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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