I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I want her autograph on my taint
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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