I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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