I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
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