Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Your cock deserves a montage
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize