My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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