Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Randomize