I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
