great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
