I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
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