I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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