I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Randomize