You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Randomize