I want to stick my p in your. b.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
