The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
