does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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