Just cropdusted the office
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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