Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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