rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
