i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
